Note: This, for now, is one of my favorite creations in the sense it took a lot of isolated concepts that I have bantered around in other musings and put them together into a relatively cohesive finished product. Of course, it hardly proves how accurate a depiction of reality is embedded therein. But as musing hobbies go, reaching conclusions of a broader nature is more satisfying. Given my age now, and the many paths trodden throughout a challenging life, time is running short to arrive at sweeping conclusions. It is not clear what purpose sweeping conclusions serve at such a short distance from the finish line. Then again, increased contentment is a good thing during any phase of life. At worst, it is harmless illusionary philosophistic (invented this word) specious claptrap with no impact whatsoever on the evolutionary process. Perhaps we are all equal in this respect.
Evaluating Our Own Persona, Worth, and Importance Via Logic and Reality
Some people are taken back when a character like Terrell Owens runs up and down the sideline yelling “I am going to love me some me” or “Who Can Make a Big Play? I can, I can,” and tells his Offensive Coach during time of a contract dispute: “You don’t talk to me unless I talk to you first”. How, the question is asked, can anyone be so self centered (obnoxious)? Then there are those who praise everyone in sight—no matter how disingenuous. Always. Which is worse I can’t say. Is either bad? I can’t say. There are those who think a lot of negativity about others, especially those not mirror images of themselves. I feel sorry for those they think bad about because so much of what these detractors say, do, and vote for is going to make the lives of their targets more difficult. I guess we all spend a lot of time thinking about others, at least those part of our own world, ethnic group, nation, cultural group, genetic cabal, etc. How we think about, and feel about others diverse from ourselves, appears to have a substantial impact on our own sense of contentment.
But when all is said and done, any realistic appraisal of ourselves, or even others, requires a firm handle on reality, and we just don’t have that. Contrary to what religious leaders preach, reality cannot come from beliefs. Beliefs, I reckon, can be true—but they can never be fact as we define fact. We all chase reality for an extremely miniscule period of evolutionary time; after all is said and done, the only sure thing is that we will die. If humans didn’t have considerable intellect and emotions, everything about us would be more unimportant, even to us, given then our poor ability to understand consequences or causes.
Religious leaders tell us God loves us, every one of us. Really? How would we know in what way God even loves? Is there ever sex involved? No preacher ever talks about the sex life of God. And if God is all powerful and loves every one of us, why didn’t He make everyone of us perfect and live on a perfect planet? And if God would not save Lincoln from tragedy what chance do we have? If I had a choice to have God remain God or let my parents be God, at least until I die, I would choose my parents. I would be more confident of a good life and good death. My mother might verbally assault me until death do we part, but if she were God I would be a star in life until death, no matter how many of her own rules she would have to break. She, as God, would do that for me. I believe in God, but it is a hard concept given my conclusions about God. God’s evolutionary process gave human ethics (the Golden Rule) so that we can help the less fortunate and therefore maximize the number of people achieving maximum contentment. Essentially God has created an evolutionary process in which we either help each other or we pay the price, both the givers and the receivers, albeit in most cases we are both.
Enough meandering here. How can we go about evaluating ourselves, assuming we can pause long enough from evaluating or judging others? I, intuitively, think I am a pretty good person, but I don’t trust the evaluations we make about ourselves or others. There is no evidence humans have mastered reality and maybe we never will. My reality just is, it comes thru tinted glasses filtered by all my experiences with my particular life. Perhaps dreams enable reality to appear just how we would like it to be (or fear it to be in case of nightmares).
So it comes down to: who is the real us? Who are the real others we know to different degrees, and who are the real others we don’t know—right now over 7 billion on our planet. After so many years with ourselves, round the clock, it still is no easy task to grade ourselves, let alone others.
We can start with ourselves and make a list of our good and bad traits. Some of these traits will be genetic. But almost all genetic traits are a matter of degree. Even skin color, yet I never see a grading system for skin color that can match the thorough grading system for paint colors. There are, after all, shades of white and black and brown and whatever. But humans only come in a few colors and many shades of these colors. Certainly we can’t grade ourselves on our genetic traits, we just inherited all this. Really, we can’t really brag about something genetic. We can just be grateful or disappointed. Other traits about us have been learned or influenced by our environment. Grading here is not much easier than the genetic traits. Some people are quick learners or have more willpower, or are physically and mentally more healthy, but all this is genetic/environmental too.
So once born, and the right to life enthusiasts disappear from the picture, there we are with certain genetic cards in our hands to play, as best we can, given our environmental circumstances. Until the end of our formative years others, to varying degrees, play our cards for us. Now this is strange in that it is the formative years which are the most important years for us to achieve our full potential—physiologically, mentally, emotionally, and anatomically. A lot can happen during the formative years which can alter any of the aforementioned. Yet we personally have so little control over these years.
Even at this point in this analysis, so much which is now us was not that much determined by us. We either inherited something about us, or we achieved our potential in many areas via help from others. The first time we are really in charge is when we go out on our own to fight all the battles of life amongst a cast of characters we mostly did not choose. Early after our formative years have ended, a lot of what we think or do reflects indoctrination during the formative years. This is hardly a logical basis for reality. Most people ‘know for sure’ that their inherited religion is the true religion, that their biological family is ‘more important’ than others, that their political views ‘are solid’, and what they most want at the time is the best focus for their actions. Much of what “we know’, at the end of our formative years, will prove to be illusional, albeit not always admitted.
While some never break the apron strings, most do, and others have no choice, or never had apron strings of any real sort. If we are going to reach our full potential as an individual it would seem, at the end of our formative years, we need discard all our indoctrinated thoughts and re-evaluate every one of them, and begin to put together our own persona, beliefs, and how we judge whether anything is wrong or right, and what are the consequences of these decisions. Everything about this process is selfish for every person. We all have to face a daunting number of choices to make, how to prioritize them, and how best to move forward on so many fronts: material acquisitions, sex, love, wealth, career success, marriage, raising children, power trips, titles, winning or losing varied contests, reputation, friendships, health matters, and so on. All these things come at us rapidly in our early productive years and will be there, in many cases, throughout. The term productive years here is simply a time span between the end of the formative years and the beginning of the retirement years. Maybe it should be titled ‘potential productive’ years.
If we die before our productive years, what exactly has been the worth or value of our life? This, I suppose, goes back to the purpose of life. We could droll on here about purported noble contributions to life here on the planet—via God’s evolutionary process, proceeding according to God’s laws of operation, but this would be little more than another attempt by us to think we run the show. I say this a lot, but the point is important as an illustration: If Lincoln had not engineered the elimination of slavery, someone else, down the line, would have. We are the puppets in the show merely responding to the multiple forces operative in the evolutionary process. This is postulated here as the reality. The goal of all humans in life is to achieve the maximum level of contentment as often and as long as we can. Contentment, like any other emotion, is not a continuous state, and if we pretend it is, or ought to be, we are then contributing to our own reduced contentment level. I, for example, don’t really worry about dying. It is the destiny of those born. I can’t escape dying but I can avoid a long drawn out miserable dying process, and thus for years I have had at hand a helium tank when I have had enough. We should all know, regarding anything we like, life included, when enough is enough.
Thus, our contentment level, during the formative years, is pretty much determined by our genes, environment, and ‘parental’ or ‘peer’ influences. We, our own persona (defined vaguely) hardly gets any credit at all. That’s exactly why it is called the formative years, we have not yet gained control over our own lives, and in some sense, considering the laws which govern the evolutionary process, we never will. God’s laws continue to prevail, at least in the long run, which is what really counts in the evolutionary process.
Here we need pause and reflect that the goal of life postulated above is a very selfish goal. I don’t think I have ever met anyone who doesn’t seek personal contentment. The elusive answer is a lifetime struggle, more for some, less for others. Given the diverse genetics, diverse environments, and chance as the operative forces, the playing field is never level for all humans. Come the first prom everyone realizes it is not who they would most like to take to the prom, but who might be a possible fit—given our appearance, our personality, our intelligence, our ’station’ in life, etc. We are, at that late stage in our formative years, less what we wish to be, and more how can we find a way to fit in which will give us maximum contentment.
But let us now leap to the end of our productive years, where it seems we have a better chance of evaluating our own worth, and I suppose, some sort of means to determine the worth of specific others. I start here with a given that the laws of evolution run evolutionary progress, not any of us. The question is never which humans are going to determine evolutionary direction, but which direction will the evolutionary process lead for the future. Whatever else we are, we are not the future. We exist at a certain minuscule point in time and all we can hope to do as individuals is to achieve the greatest amount of contentment we can.
When we stand on the threshold of our productive years we have certain cards in our hands which we did not earn but inherited via genes, and certain beliefs and values instilled in us by others and our environmental circumstances during our formative years—including a unique personality, a unique physical specimen, and varied degrees of intelligence (using the term vaguely), and some times unique talents of some sort. To the extent all of this in the last sentence is true, we are reaching past human capabilities to actually measure the worth of anyone at a specific point in time. Even after we conclude that contentment is everyone’s goal, how can we accurately measure this? I feel more contented in my terminational years than I felt in my formative and productive years. But, of course, this is a feeling and perhaps the feeling is illusionary. We all have known people who sing ‘zippedy do dah day’ most of the time even when nothing much is going right for them. Illusions of that sort are simple protective denials.
Let’s take material wealth. Does this bring contentment? Various studies show, in the United States right now, that material wealth does affect contentment up to about $70,000 dollars/yr income, and then it fades away as contributing to contentment. This is probably a ball park figure since we all vary in exactly at what point income will be enough to ‘allow’ us to gain a degree of contentment. Physical appearance might be measured this way also. After a certain point it doesn’t continue to contribute to our contentment. Titles probably fit here too—we all would like to be ‘somebody’, but after a certain point titles have their limitations.
This all leads to an important point about life: addictions and compulsive behaviors, by definition, cannot lead to contentment. This in turn leads to the caution that we need learn when enough is enough of most anything we seek for pleasure or contentment. We may need a certain degree of physical attractiveness to achieve sexual successes, but too much of a good thing here can easily lead to compulsive/addictive behavior and when it does, contentment will never be achieved. We all know the most attractive have a far greater divorce rate than those only moderately attractive. I am not sure about the least attractive, I suspect they may hang in there longer for the simple reason their prospects for a more attractive mate are slim. Wealth, is another matter to consider. My career brought me in close enough contact with wealthy persons (I was even a chauffeur at one time), and it is clear that they are not a happy lot at all, with few exceptions (a Gates or a Buffet comes to mind). Just recently I was eating an ice cream cone in McDonalds during off peak hours, and the helpers (who work hard for such trifling wages) were constantly laughing and joking with each other. It dawned on me that I heard more good natured laughter from them in twenty minutes than I have ever heard from Donald Trump during hours of his public appearances (unless you count sneering at others a form of laughter). Who, despite all his wealth, is less contented in life than that man?. And it would be hard to find anyone who has such a long record of swindling others, and making the lives of so many others so much more miserable. Maybe he just wants company, the old ‘misery loves company notion.
Take most anything capable of creating addiction or compulsive behavior and when enough is enough is not enforced, it will never bring contentment; that includes wealth, sex, titles, athletic success, eating, spending money on endless material things, gambling, recreational drug use, most hobbies, winning, and so on. Once addictive or compulsive, contentment deteriorates.
One logical reason for humans having a finite existence in the evolutionary process is that it simply becomes more difficult, over time, to achieve the same excitement, or challenge, that was once achievable for the same life experience. People vary, but when someone advises me to spend my time in my terminational years going out, doing adventurous things, take on challenging tasks, and just live life to the hilt as long as I am healthy——well, been there, done that, and I view the terminational years as the opportunity to mellow out, control the pace at which I do anything, and emotionally live via the gratitude for the many people, who often out of the blue, helped me succeed at this or that in my productive years, or at least stopped me from hanging myself figuratively speaking.
I don’t have a lot of respect for those who brag about their achievements in life and proudly believe that they achieved their success the hard way, they earned it—and furthermore those that have not achieved such level of success simply failed themselves by not earning it, like they themselves did.
I suppose, using genetic or environmental factors, and a great deal of help from others along the way, I may have made some good decisions along the way and can pat myself on the back——EXCEPT, without the genetic, environmental and chance factors, the opportunity to make good decisions would have seldom been there. When we can understand this, then we can see the brilliance of the human genetic sense of ethics (the Golden Rule).
Since this is a human genetic trait, and like any genetic trait, it varies in degrees—all of us can be ethical to varying degrees. How ethical appears to depend on, among other things, the genetic degree of willpower we inherited. Willpower and ethical behavior are linked and operative together. It is not often that we don’t know how to apply the Golden Rule. But it is often that our immediate self interest would be to ignore the Golden Rule and apply it at a more convenient time. Willpower is our first line of defense for good ethics, and since our willpower decreases over time, habit may then need be the driving force to keep the Golden Rule operative. Doing the right thing might not bring immediate benefit to our bank account, or career advancement, or marital stability, or any other immediate want, but it is like money in the bank towards a more contented state in the long run—which is really what counts.
Nothing can be achieved by ethics without a reward for being ethical. It appears the reward is contentment in our lives, not some contrived Heaven after death. In essence, contentment is achieved by both the givers and the recipients. Almost all human created religious sects conveniently have a loop-hole for escaping any permanent ban from their proposed Heaven after death. That, of course, is repentance, even on our death bed in some cases. This is logical nonsense. Maybe when younger we were a little wild and killed three people in state of rage. Let’s say two out of the three had not yet repented their sins. They go to Hell. But we, in our maturity, have repented and are no longer going to kill others. So off we go to Heaven. That’s a good deal. Maybe we all ought to wear wrist bracelets that instruct: “Please use all means to keep me alive until I have repented. Thank you.”
Let’s take two well known ‘successful’ people and measure their contentment levels. Abraham Lincoln was born a ‘nothing burger’ in a log cabin. No matter, Abraham, like others, understood that the Golden Rule was an ethical principle. He also grew, pretty much on his own, to have real insight into human diversity and nature. He had a lot of inherited willpower, learned to focus his attention on matters that interested him, never joined any church, and communicated with each person as unique and precious. He never pigeon holed people into groups to like and dislike except those who mistreated others for selfish gain. All who personally knew Lincoln tended to like him precisely because he liked and understood them. And he was genuine, not a pretentious slap your back, disingenuous social gad fly. Nor was he particularly close as friendships went. He was a loner, and people tended to come to him, not he to them. There are no stories about how Lincoln stiffed or swindled or tricked anyone for his own advantage. He lived simply, he dressed simply, he ate simply, and yet he was one of the most contented persons I have ever studied.
Some will say, “Wait a minute, he was known for depression, sometimes severe.” That is true, but being contented does not excuse us from any of the normal emotions in life. Contentedness is more a state of mind in which you know you are doing the right thing, the best you can do, and intend to keep on doing the right thing, and the best you can do. Lincoln was President during one of the most brutal civil wars, in which horrid things were happening to hundreds of thousands of his citizens. That would seem a situation in which depression would be appropriate. Depressed often during the ordeal, nevertheless Lincoln never lost any of his mental acuities or his determination to just keep doing the right thing as dictated by the Golden Rule. Lincoln never saw things as the Devil vs God, or evil and good, or found any group of humans to be a symbol of bad or good people. Each person, to Lincoln should be judged on their own merits, no matter what religion, race, culture, or political wing. It may sound weird, but Lincoln’s depression was a healthy depression. He personally felt the pain of all who suffered during that war. Of course he was shot to death, hardly the kind of reward God would give Lincoln if God were intervening with His own laws of evolution to save a particular person from these laws.
Now let’s take a look at another President with whom everyone is also familiar. Donald Trump was born in wealth—and money became His God—his measure of his own success. He loves to say that he has so much money he doesn’t even really know how much he has. Very well, let’s not quibble here about whether money, no matter how obtained, can be a measure of success. Trump made his money with a few million dollars from his dad as a start up. Outside of making money by any means, Trump is not known for being an educated person on virtually any topic. When is the last time the American public ever heard Donald Trump sit down and calmly explain the logic and intricacies of any policy issue that is important to our country?” He simply rants and raves, lies about matters that are impossible to really lie about, gives just about everyone of importance a juvenile derogatory nickname, brags about himself endlessly, is never in a good mood, is humorless unless smirking at the many groups of people he can’t stand, stays up half the night tweeting sophomoric insults at friends and foes alike, and personally creates more misery for those citizens least able to defend themselves. His wealth was obtained by stiffing contractors who built his buildings, and the investors who invested money in his ventures via declaring bankruptcy (through legal loopholes available to the wealthy), then using his numerous bankruptcies as the basis for paying no taxes. With each contrived bankruptcy Trump grew exponentially more wealthy. His justification for all this, in his words is “That is because I am smart”. If there is any contentment in his life it would be hard to spot. The man is clearly miserable, which I suppose, is deserved considering how much misery he is causing the least fortunate in our country. Still, many of the less fortunate fail to see this. What his popularity reflects is just how angry and discontented so many people are, and to the point where they vote for the candidate most angry about everything and everybody. People who think Trump is the sole problem are misguided. When 43% of adults in this country do not have enough income to even qualify to pay federal income taxes, we have a huge problem. When three citizens have as much wealth as the bottom 50% of our citizens, we have a huge problem. Trump did not create this situation. He just personally got elected by this situation.
I need conclude here, as usual, because of the length. We are all selfish and want to achieve contentment for ourselves in life. Ironically, the amount of contentment we can achieve is directly related to the Golden Rule—specifically how much we give to others by our words, actions, and votes, and how much luck we have in life being recipients of the Golden Rule by others—individually and collectively via government policies. We should never forget that every government is responsible for all the communities within its borders. Patriotism should always be directed toward all of humanity. We cannot measure our personal worth because we are all here as diverse entities. We would be comparing apples and oranges. Given that genetic diversity, environmental diversity, and chance all play huge roles in the evolutionary process we cannot shake up the can, let a few of the millions of combinations fall out of the can and then judge their worth amongst them. We can only use the Golden Rule to generate some genuine contentment in our own lives and support government policies which ensure all citizens— especially children, receive good health care, safe environments, good schools, good teachers, job opportunities at livable wages, good pensions, adequate vacation time, and a job situation where 30 hrs is today full time employment, since machines now can do so much of the work humans used to have to do. Somehow, everything is falling out of kilter, and so far, for the time being, Humpty Dumpty and all the Kings Men, cannot put Humpty Dumpty together again. Having ended on a depressing note, we need remember that us humans do not control the evolutionary process—-yet there is no reason to believe forward progress in evolution will stop. It all started 4.5 billion years ago, humans appeared on the scene about 2.5 million years ago, human agricultural communities appeared around 100,000 years ago, written language appeared around 20,000 years ago, and the American Constitution was written about around 250 years ago. We do not ourselves have such evolutionary time vast span perspectives to remotely forecast much of anything about the future, nor will we be among the players in that future. A decent degree of contentment during our life is about the all and end all of it, while generalized adherence to the Golden Rule is everyone’s ticket to maximum contentment.