A Formula for the Best Terminational Years (life after our productive years).
Given human diversity, no singular equation can be worked out; the best we can do is list some of the factors which play a role. What differs is the degree to which each of the factors below play at the individual level. These factors are not listed in order of importance since that will vary.
1. Good Health
2. A sense of gratitude for life’s successes, no matter how modest.
3. Good past memories of people and things and places
4. The degree to which the Golden Rule reigns outside of immediate family
5. The degree to which we have understood during our productive years when ‘enough is enough’ regarding our goals, our wealth, our titles, our power over others, our achievements. When enough is never enough, and we end up with compulsive behaviors in any aspect of our lives, then maximum contentment will never be achieved, just temporary states of happiness which become harder to match as the compulsive behavior continues.
6. Empathy for those less fortunate. Not the theoretical disingenuous whimsical empathy which contributes nothing to those in need via our time, proper political support, or with our money—or any combination of these three. To simply—occasionally—for self serving motives, express to others present our ‘heartfelt’ sympathy for the less fortunate (often really meaning imagined heathens, less talented, dumb-assed, or got-what-they-deserved) is just another way to exempt ourselves from any blame for their situation.
7. The ability to amuse ourselves, and not depend on those in their productive years to spend a lot of time amusing us. They need to get on with their lives and we need to enjoy our terminational years on our own, and eventually learn to die alone, which almost everyone really does anyway. Withdrawal from our surrounding earthly environment is a universal part of the last lap for most people. We have all been present when a dying person is surrounded by others, all wailing in some fashion, except for the person dying.
8. Find ways to feel more connected with Nature and the Evolutionary process. We are a part of this process and to think otherwise and keep trying to swim upstream, is a mistake. No one is exempt from the laws of nature.
9. Appreciate Quietude and Solitude—the days of wine and roses don’t last forever. Appreciation for the happenstance of being in life’s ‘game’ can last forever until our required departure.
10. Let go of many pleasures of the past—trying to be more important than we are, trying to still run things that should be run by those in their productive years, and accept the reality that we are, by nature, relegated to the bleachers in our terminational years, so then we learn to enjoy the show rather than hopelessly keep trying to run it, hovering around the ‘huddle on the field’ still hoping we can ‘carry the ball’ once in awhile. It is easy to be pathetic in our terminational years.
11. We need to learn the difference between our efforts to understand more about this thing called our lives, and resist any desire to get back on the actual playing field.
12. Learn to enjoy the simpler things in life like reading, exercise of some sort, appreciating nature, appreciating human diversity, science, cooking, eating, enriching our lives via the internet/TV/movies, and so on.
13. It is probably useful to understand the ramifications of where we stand in the following categories—not that it is possible to fit neatly in particular categories. We, are after all, complicated individuals.
early risers/early to bedders or late risers/late to bedders
homebodies or anywhere but home most of the day
social chit-chatters or private mental philosophers of some sort.
city or rural creatures
excitement seekers or quiet contentment seekers
appreciate diversity or see heathens/detestable people everywhere
serious or nonsensical
The list above can surely be longer and better identifiable, but whatever the general category probably impacts on just how we need organize our terminational years.
14. The terminational years allows, probably even demands, we be more selfish with our time. We did a lot of things in our productive years out of duty, responsibility, cooperation, goal achievements, achieve victories, to succeed with our career, to be social, to fit in differing situations, etc. What we will let go and avoid in our terminational years will differ. I, for example pretty much tossed away social chit chat with those who I will seldom or ever see. It seems a waste of time and I don’t care what someone’s career is, endless chatter about grandchildren, and other endless topics which have no bearing on my own contentedness at this stage in life. Other people in their terminational years thrive on this sort of thing and really need a smart phone which can be permanently attached to their ear. I see people on a train, for example, a lot of people, who desperately dial up one person after another for fear they might have to actually generate some meaningful thoughts on their own. The conversations and text messages are mostly inane and shallow. Is this bad? I really don’t know. It is sure a different kind of existence—a sort of global Tower of Babel. Personally, I detect more frenzy and desperation than peace of mind with this avenue of existence. It is almost like they sit most of the day staring at their ‘smart phone’ which is never more than inches away, as their eyes portray this burning need for the phone to buzz or ring or project some melody. It just doesn’t seem compulsive disorders ever generate contentment. Of course, I am not going to make any effort here to identify my own compulsive disorders—maybe writing musings fit in here—except there is no dependence on others here in that I can write as the mood hits me, about any topic I choose, and do not use the musings to push down anyone’s throat (I have no idea who reads these musings or even can find their storage site on the internet)—these musings exist just to increase my own level of contentment about issues in life that interest me. For me understanding (right or wrong) enables me to elevate the degree of contentment about this thing called life.
As usual, nothing above is claimed to be a comprehensive long thought out treatise, with footnotes, references, and any philosophical ‘creme de la creme’ of the topic. Whenever any of us use our own experiences and knowledge to further our ‘own’ personal understanding of issues, we edge ever more higher on our own contentment scale. Each has to elevate their own contentment level with choices that mesh well with their own unique and often peculiar essence. There will never be another like us (and in some cases we can all certainly hope not).
